The Rich and The Poor Family

A father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the purpose of showing his son how poor people live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.

On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?" "It was great, Dad." "Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked. "Oh yeah," said the son. "So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.

Praying ABC's

One evening, my father overheard his grandson Ace repeating the alphabet in reverent, calm and silent tones.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm praying, Grandpa," he said. "I can't think of the right words, so I just say all the letters. God will put them together for me, because He knows what I'm thinking."

Patience, Humor, and Sacrifice

While shopping at one of the supermarkets here in Dubai, I noticed a woman with four boys and a baby. Her patience was wearing thin as the boys called out, "Mommy! Mommy!" while she tried to shop.

Finally, she blurted out, "I don't want to hear the word mommy for at least ten minutes!"

Positive and Negative Thinking

There was once a weary traveler who sat down and rest under a tree. He didn't know that the tree he rested upon was a magical tree. It is called The Wish-Granting Tree.

Seated on the hard ground, he thought how pleasant it would be if he can sleep in a soft bed. Instantly, a bed appeared before him. Astonished, the man immediately climbed onto the bed.

Presence Not Presents

The story is told about three brothers, who after years of hard work and leading busy lives, wanted to make their father happy especially on Christmas Day. To make up for the three years, the eldest gifted him with a big house. The second son surprised him with a limousine, and the youngest gifted him with an expensive parrot that can recite the whole Bible.

Bring A Better Face

When I was applying for the renewal of my passport here in Dubai, the photographer & his staff who took document identification photos were apparently fed up with complaints about the quality of the IDs.

This sign was posted where it could be seen by everyone coming in for a new shot: "If you want a better picture, bring a better face!"

Representative of The Holidays

Three men die on Christmas Eve and go to heaven, where they're met by Saint Peter. "In order to get in," he tells them, "you must each produce something representative of the holidays."

The first man digs into his pockets and pulls out a match and lights it. "This represents a candle of hope."

Haircut or Shave

About a month ago, while waiting for my turn for the barber to make me handsome (ahem!), a man walked into his shop asking how much it is for a haircut. "30 dirhams (Eight dollars)," he answered. "And for a shave?" "20 dirhams (Five dollars)."

"All right," he said, settling in line to the barber chair. "Shave my head."

"Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." Proverbs 16:24.

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What's the Number Before Infinity?

One morning while preparing my sons for their day at school, we were reviewing numbers and counting. Suddenly my eldest son Ace asked, "Papa, what is the biggest number in the world?"

Risky Job

Working in the field operations for DEWA with a technical associate driving, all over Dubai, is obviously risky like any other jobs. Some TA's like to chat while driving, while some likes it to just listen over the radio and keep it quiet and just drive. But sometimes I'd worry about them falling asleep at the wheel.

So here's a tip to stay awake.

Big Bag of Peanuts

One day, a bus driver was driving a bunch of senior citizens-they called themselves Club 20. Because they got 20% discounts in restaurants and drugstores.

Soon, the little old lady in the front row tapped the driver's shoulder and gave him a big bag of peanuts. And the driver ate them.

Take a Moment

Take a moment to listen today to what your children are trying to say. Listen to them, whatever you do or they won’t be there to listen to you.

Listen to their problems, listen to their needs, praise their smallest triumphs, praise their littlest deeds. Tolerate their chatter, amplify their laughter. Find out what’s the matter, find out what they’re after.

Funny Breakfast Quotes

Here is a small collection of funny breakfast quotes by Mr. Unknown

A rich man's joke is always funny.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

Breakfast Quotes

If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy, and inspires your hopes. --Andrew Carnegie

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly. --Robert F. Kennedy

Fear of failure must never be a reason not to try something. --Frederick Smith

Credit Card Denied

My friend received a credit card application in the mail that he had not requested. He didn't want it, but I did. So I crossed off my friend's name on the form, entered my own and returned the application. I soon got a phone call from a woman saying my application had been rejected.

I asked her why, and she told me the card could only be issued to the person originally solicited by the offer. However, she invited me to re-apply, which I did during the same telephone call.

My Breakfast Secrets

The secret to life is living it one day at a time.

Our lives are made up of a million moments spent in a million different ways. Some are spent searching for love, peace and harmony. Others are spent surviving day to day. But there is no greater moment than when we find that life (with all its joys and sorrows) is meant to be lived one day at a time.

Each day is new, and living one day at a time enables us to truly enjoy life and live it to the fullest.

Beginning today

A Diaper for Infant Jesus

I was telling my two wonderful boys, over the video call on the internet, the story of the Nativity and how the Wise Men brought gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh for the infant Jesus. Clearly giving it a lot of thought, my five-year-old Mac observed, "Papa, a Wise man would have brought diapers."

"Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me." Matthew 18:4-5
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White Hairs

One day a little boy was sitting and watching his father do the carpentry works at the garage. He suddenly noticed that his dad had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast to his black head. He looked at his dad and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Dad?"

His father replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

Wanted: PARENTS

Be prepared, this is hysterical. If it had been presented this way, I don't believe any of us would have done it!

POSITION:  Mom, Dad, Mommy, Daddy, Mama, Papa, Ma, Pa

JOB DESCRIPTION

Long term, team players needed for challenging, permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work in variable hours which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required. 

RESPONSIBILITIES
  1. The rest of your life.
  2. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs 5bucks.
  3. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.
  4. Must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule (someone who can be ridden, or be forced to carry heavy objects for no pay or gratitude) and be able to go from zero to 60mph in three seconds flat in case.
  5. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers.
  6. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
  7. Must have the ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
  8. Must be willing to be indispensable.
  9. Must be able to handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap plastic toys and battery operated devices.
  10. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
  11. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product.
  12. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT AND PROMOTION

None. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE

None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION
  1. Get this! You pay them!
  2. Offering frequent raises and bonuses.
  3. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent.
  4. When you die, you give them whatever is left.
  5. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.
BENEFITS

While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love,
and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.

Forward this on to all the PARENTS you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis, letting them know they are appreciated for the fabulous job they do... or forward with love to anyone thinking of applying for the job.

AND A FOOTNOTE? THERE IS NO RETIREMENT -- EVER!!!

If you are fortunate enough you will become grandparents!

Keep Laughing, best medicine for the heart and mind.

Brotherly Love

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with his five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, he asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy, the oldest in the class, answered, "Thou shall not kill."
"How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!" Psalm 133:1
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Great Swimmer

Three young boys were boasting about their grandpas.

The first boy, an American, said: "My grandpa is a great swimmer. He can swim for hours before getting out of the water!" 

The second boy, an Arab, said, "That's nothing. My grandpa always goes swimming at 6:00 in the morning every day, and only comes back at 9:00 in the evening because my grandma says he has to!"

The Verbal Wound

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence...

First on the Sun

One day, an American, a Russian, and a Filipino were talking.

The Russian said, “We were first in space!” The American said, “We were first on the moon!” The Filipino said, “So what? Haven’t you been reading the newspaper? Our economy is doing very well. Mark my words, the Philippines will be a First World country. And we will be the first one on the sun!”

Me First, Me First!

One day, while Daddy was cooking pancakes, his two small boys were fighting over who would eat the first pancake Daddy would cook. Both of them said, “Me first, me first!”

Their father shook his head and said, “Boys, boys, if Jesus were here, he would say, ‘Dad, let my brother eat the pancake first.’

Mark, the 5-year old, told his younger brother, “Ace, you be Jesus.”

"The poor will eat and be satisfied; they who seek the LORD will praise him--may your hearts live forever!" Psalm 22:26

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I and ME

"There's no I in TEAM!"

How many times have you heard that? If you took my friend's sales training course, you heard it plenty. But he stopped repeating it after one trainee reminded him, "Maybe there's no I in team, but there's definitely an M and an E."

"Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips." Psalm 27:2
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The Normal Person

Part of the application process for my previous employer was to undergo neuro-psychiatric test in the Mental Hospital. While on the psych ward, my colleague asked how doctors decide to institutionalize a patient.

"Well," the director said, "we fill a bathtub, then offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient, and ask him to empty the tub."

"I get it," my colleague said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's the biggest."

"No," the director said. "A normal person would pull the plug."

''Listen, my son, accept what I say, and the years of your life will be many." Proverbs 10
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The Beer Drinkers

An American, a Japanese, and a Filipino are at a bar. When they get their beers, they notice a fly in each mug. The American politely asks the bar tender for another beer, then proceeds to sip it. The Japanese spills out just enough to get rid of the fly and quaffs the rest. 

It's now the Pinoy's turn. He sticks his hand into the beer, grabs the fly by the wings, and shouts, "Spit it out! Spit it out!"
"In the end it bites like a snake and poisons like a viper." Psalm 32
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Missing In Action

Our co-worker went missing for a few hours, and we tore up the office looking for him. The boss finally found him fast asleep. Rather than wake him, he quietly placed a note on the man's chest. "As long as you're asleep," it read, "you have a job. But as soon as you wake up, you're fired."

"Do not love sleep or you will grow poor; stay awake and you will have food to spare." Proverbs 20:13
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Coffee Thief

How do you stop a thief? This was the question that vexed my friend, a rugged Boss. Every morning he picked up coffee from Starbucks, and every morning that cup of coffee mysteriously disappeared from his desk.

Although he never caught the bandit, he did resolve the matter.

One morning, when all personnel were gathered for a staff meeting, he popped out the partial plate from his mouth and swished it around in his coffee before placing it back. His coffee was never stolen again.

"Set a guard over my mouth, Oh Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips." Psalm 141:3

The Lawyer and the Pig

A lawyer, driving on a country road, encountered a crowd in one intersection. Thinking cleverly and wanting to throw his weight around to get to the scene, he shouted, "Let me through! I am a relative of the victim!" Upon hearing this, the crowd made way for him and lo and behold, lying in front of everyone was a dead pig run over by a car.

"He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way." Psalm 25:9
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Gentleness of Soul

Someone once said that if religion has done nothing to your temper, then it has not done much to your soul.

Why is it that there are people who claim to love God, yet go on hurting other people?

Why is that there are people who have so many devotions and are prayerful, but are proud, arrogant, and deceitful?

Before you talk about your religion on your devotions, let's talk first about gentleness of your soul.

"It is better to be righteous that to be a religious person."
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In Control

I saw this beautiful advertisement at the back of a bus with this message: "Next time, relax, take the bus, and leave the driving to us."

Time was when I insisted to do all the driving myself. I always wanted to be in control, and I didn't want anybody to drive for me. But now, honestly, I'm happy if others can drive for me. I have come to accept that I need people to help bring me to my destination.

"I place myself in you care. You will save me, Lord; you are a faithful God." Psalm 31:5
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Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?

There is a Chinese story of an old farmer who had an old horse for tilling his fields. One day the horse escaped into the hills and, when all the farmer's neighbors sympathized with the old man over his bad luck, the farmer replied, 'Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?'

A week later the horse returned with a herd of wild horses from the hills and this time the neighbors congratulated the farmer on his good luck. His reply was, 'Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?'

Drinking Beer

According to a text message I received, it is not true that beer makes you fat. On the contrary, beer makes you lean - lean on walls, lean on doors, and lean on people. So drink beer more often.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." Proverbs 3:5
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Last Request

There is a story about a pastor who asked the convict seated at the electric chair if he had a last request. "Yes, Pastor. Please stay with me and hold my hands," was the convicts reply.

"I will always be with you; I will never abandon you." Joshua 1:5

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A Wealth Tale

A wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream.

The next day she met another traveler who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. She did so without hesitation.

The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime.
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Lessons Learned from INVICTUS Movie


The film tells the inspiring true story of how Nelson Mandela (Morgan Freeman) joined forces with the captain of South Africa's rugby team, played by Matt Damon, to help unite their country. Newly elected President Mandela knows his nation remains racially and economically divided in the wake of apartheid (invictus). Believing he can bring his people together through the universal language of sport, Mandela rallies South Africa's rugby team as they make their historic run to the 1995 Rugby World Cup Championship match.

Directed by Clint Eastwood that had two Oscar nominations; this is a good movie to see. And here are the lessons I learned from watching this film:

It always seems impossible until its done.

A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination.
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Thank You

Yesterday, I had the privilege to be interviewed by a committee selecting the best employee in our company. They told that within the department, seven were selected as nominees and luckily I am one of them.
 
But hey, this blog is not all about that, and I'm not bragging up myself here. It's about that one question that got me. It was "What is your greatest achievement in the company?"

I paused, and I said "Thank you."

A Grass Hut Moment


One day, a man was stranded in an island. He decided to protect himself from the burning hot sun. For many days, he built a grass hut. But on the day he was to sleep in it, a lightning hit the roof, starting a fire. He hurried to put it out, but it was no use. Everything burned down.

Honesta and Prudentia

During one of my nine-hour flight from Manila to Dubai, when the cabin lights were already dimmed, an Emirates Airline stewardess approached me. She found a set of dentures in one of the lavatories. She wanted to find the owner of the dentures, but on the other hand, she did not want to embarrass the owner by announcing it publicly.

Giving Light Till The End


A story is told about two wounded soldiers who were recuperating in the same hospital room during WWII. Every day the soldier whose bed is beside the window would describe the outside world to the other soldier who lay in bed, paralyzed from the neck down. One morning, the soldier beside the window passed away.

Tossing the Coin


The valedictorian reported for his university final examination which consisted of "yes/no" type questions. He took his seat in the examination hall and stared at the question paper for five minutes.

In a fit of inspiration, he took his purse out, removed a coin and started tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Yes for Heads and No for Tails. Within half an hour he was all done, whereas the rest of the class was still sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he was seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.

Short and Highly Emotional


Cherry was at a business conference. During a break, she decided to call home collect.

Her six-year-old son picked up the phone and heard a stranger’s voice say, “We have Cherry on the line. Will you accept the charges?” Frantic, the six-year-old dropped the receiver and came charging outside screaming, “Grandma! They have Mom! And they want money!”

Baseball in Heaven


Earl and Bob, both obsessed with baseball, never missed their favorite team’s game. They promised, whoever died first, and went to heaven, would come back to earth and tell the other if there was baseball in heaven.

One day, Earl died. Bob waited for him to come back. Finally Earl did. He said to Bob. "I have good news and bad news. I'll tell you the good news first. There is baseball in heaven." Bob said, "That’s the best news!" Then Earl said, time for the bad news... ”You're pitching tomorrow night."

Clever Businessman


Before going to Europe on business, a man drives his Rolls-Royce to a downtown New York City bank and asks for an immediate loan of $5,000.

The loan officer, taken aback, requests collateral. "Well then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce," the man says. The loan officer promptly has the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping and gives the man the $5,000.

Which Tire Was Flat


Four high school boys, afflicted with spring fever, skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tire.

Much to their relief the teacher smiled and said: "Well, you missed a test today so take seats apart from one another and take out a piece of paper. I"ll give a second chance to pass."

Doctor vs Mechanic

A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle on a beautiful morning when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike. The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

Word Power

A husband who always came home late at night would always try to make up by greeting his wife: "How is the beautiful mother of my three wonderful children?" Somehow, he always got away with it.

One night when the husband greeted her with his usual line, the wife who was so annoyed with his style cheerfully greeted him: "And how are you, the father of one of my children?"

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ISA for All

  • A True Friend - All we need is a little bit of everything and a whole lot of ISA. Sometimes you will feel upset when a mutual friend supported someone else’s point of view...